Complaining About Movies

I like movies, you probably like movies, but neither of us goes to every movie that comes out. Because we don’t have to. Not every movie is for me. So, complaining about the movies that I won’t watch anyway would be an exercise in self-indulgent futility, right?

Superhero movies are unrealisticThis blog (could no one come up with a better name than something that sounds like the onomatopoetic sound of a chunky burp?) essentially exists for me to work through personal embarrassment and insecurities.  The title invokes my desire to give an uncomfortable level honesty whilst filtering that through my bizarre ideas. One of those insecurities is the things that I like.

I like comic books and, ostensibly, comic book movies. I did not grow up with religion, but I did grow up with comic books and this new age of movies geared perfectly to my prolonged adolescence, it’s like going to church. When people complain about the glut of comic book movies, it’s like complaining there are too many gay marriages, we have been waiting so long for this epoch to happen, let us have our moment.

Why complain about what type of movies are coming out? You go see it or you don’t? They’re not taking away the movies you like to make these other movies. “God, I am so tired of all these Renaissance Dramas!” That’s how dumb it sounds when people complain about superhero movies. “I wish they’d stop making all these insufferable romantic comedies! All they do is kiss and make lame jokes.” So what? Nobody is forcing me to watch them Clockwork Orange-style.

clockwork orange

I don’t enjoy the fact that everything I grew up watching and playing is being distorted, vivisected and displayed on meat hooks like Barnum and Bailey getting ahold of a hairless dog in the 1920’s. But no one is forcing me to spend money to see Battleship or Transformers. Complaining about remakes and reboots and superhero movies is about as fulfilling and progressive as fighting against marriage equality for gay people. You’re not going to win, you’re not going to even make a difference, Don Quixote.

If superhero movies followed the laws of physics.
If superhero movies followed the laws of physics.

My wish in complaining against complaining–which may be my own Quixotic adventure–is that people save their breath and get worked up about something they can make a difference about, like net neutrality or their racist parents. If you’re complaining about genres of movies, please, make sure you’re done fighting the ocean first.

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14 Comments

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  1. Romcoms, in which beautiful have a hard time finding love and then do so in hilarious ways are about as believable as a movie about a guy with a cape who can fly. Most movies, are unbelievable, so it just depends on what fantasy you enjoy the best.

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  2. As usual, you are way off base.

    If I don’t like a movie – or even an entire genre of movies – then no one should like them. In fact, they shouldn’t be made at all.

    Couldn’t the money spent making Ant-Man have been better used feeding the poor? I mean, no, it probably wuld not have been used to feed the poor under any circumstances, but I don’t want to see Ant-Man.

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  3. abeerfortheshower July 27, 2015 — 8:21 am

    Okay, I get what you’re saying. Really, I do. But I have two words for you: Adam Sandler. Two more: Kevin James.

    Just because Paul Blart, Mall Cop Part 4 CAN happen, doesn’t mean that it SHOULD. Or that we shouldn’t complain about these two men leaving a great big yearly Cleveland steamer on the American public. This week, Adam Sandler ruined my generation’s love of classic video games. There’s nothing he won’t destroy with terrible, idiotic comedy. He’s a goddamn monster, and he needs to be stopped.

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  4. That’s a tall order, though. I’m pretty sure people would spontaneously combust (Google says this isn’t a real word, for some reason) if they weren’t allowed to complain about things they don’t approve of to the point of trying to deprive others who may or may not like said things of them as well. We’re a species that needs to force its will upon everything, including each other. You’re messing with the natural order, man!

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  5. I haven’t really seen a movie in ages, like, like maybe 10 years. DANG!!! I need to get out more.

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  6. I’d like to bitch about the following, please. Wagner’s Ring Cycle of four operas is literally impossible to stage. To do it justice would require the operas to be filmed with massive CGI, like a superhero movie. But now that the technology finally exists, no one is going to spend a gazillion bucks to film four German operas because the audience for it is now too small. But Adam Sandler and Kevin James can film whatever dreck they want. There is no justice in this world.

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  7. I don’t mind if you like “comic book” movies. I don’t go to movies more than once a year. Sometimes that number dips to zero times. I can find my quirky, indie comedies and enthralling documentaries on Netflix. You go right ahead and watch what you like. It’s no skin off my ass.

    Love,
    Janie

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  8. I don’t watch movies very often there are movies I would like to watch but rarely have the time to do so

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  9. Someone’s a little defensive of ant man, eh?

    TBH, until I saw a preview, I thought it was about a half ant, half man hybrid, and was fairly grossed out (ants are GROSS, yo). Then I saw that it just meant he’s a tiny paul rudd, and felt stupid for awhile.

    But I hear you – I’m a big fan of musicals. Like Evita. Yes, the one with Madonna in it.

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  10. Greetings and yes, I typing this on behalf of my alleged human, Gary who I allow to blog over at the site named, “klahanie”.

    Nothing wrong with a few comic book type movies, fur sure, my actual human pickle n’stuff type friend 🙂 The Adventures of Penny the Jack Russell dog and Internet Superstar Superhero!” coming to a screen near you.

    I wont tell you what the genre “Period Drama” is actually all about! Arf and thanks for this.

    Penny! 🙂

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